It is reasonable to say that bereavement care in society is not everything that it could be. This fact is generally recognised and things are slowly changing for the better.
At Tapper Funeral Service we are not bereavement counsellors but we do have a wealth of experience in the field and have a number of contacts, both professional and charitable, that can offer further help.
We are conscious that the time between death and funeral is often very busy and perhaps even something of a roller coaster. The funeral itself is often taken over with family and friends who rarely get together; the time can even be high-spirited, causing more of a 'low' feeling afterwards. It is the time after the funeral when often the bereavement really hits home. As the funeral concludes, family and friends go back to their own lives and the relationship between us as funeral directors and our client families draws to a natural close. Just being able to cope with every day affairs may seem an impossible task to the next of kin, particularly in the case of a spouse's/partner's death.
In more traditional times there was a time-honoured system in place to help people at the time of bereavement. Family members tended to live much closer together, the village community offered much more help than in town and the local church (and the vicar thereof) was at the very heart of the community.
Bereavement is such a complex and individual set of circumstance that it would be dangerous to offer much advice here other than the following general pointers:-
• To keep in mind that while extremely painful, the reactions to bereavement are entirely normal and healthy
• In the event of losing a spouse/partner to learn the aspects of your combined lives that the other dealt with
• To try to keep active, both physically and mentally
• To be aware that certain dates may be low points; for example, birthdays, Christmas, anniversaries
• To accept that the road to recovery is often a long and painful one but can usually be achieved
We welcome the opportunity to help and advise our client families after the funeral has taken place; we can often offer practical advice or put you in touch with like-minded people. Please feel free to contact us again at anytime in the future.
